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Are You Embracing Self-Care Sustainability?

2/26/2020

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​At this month’s DAFFY Date (February) we chatted with our wonderful group of girls about the greatest love story of all time and how it directly relates to YOU.

We believe:
The greatest love story of all time is not the one that keeps us up at night wondering where our prince charming is or how we can embody a ‘Notebook’ type of love story. 
 
The greatest love story of all time is the relationship you have with yourself.  This relationship with yourself sets the tone for every page you write in YOUR OWN life’s storybook and every other external relationship that comes into your life.” – Britt Olson & Chelsea Harris
Your great love story is already within you. Sometimes we need a little help uncovering it or help finding it. We've both lost our own love story before too. 
 
In order to get back to writing your love story or to check up on how your love story is going, it’s important that you say YES to 3 simple questions:
1. Are you actively looking within yourself?
2. Are you accepting of yourself?
3. Are you embracing your self-care sustainability?

​We believe in Question 3 SO MUCH that it is actually one of DAFFY’s core sustainability practices.
​This question is action. The actionable steps that will further propel you to living the greatest, most beautiful love story ever told. 
Practicing self-care every day is key for your love story to be the greatest of all time.”
– Chelsea Harris 
​We’ve illustrated DAFFY self-care sustainability as a checklist for you to review every day so that it becomes a natural mental check list.
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DOWNLOAD YOUR COPY HERE
​What's really neat about this checklist (other than it's simple favors)...You don’t have to do every single item on the checklist at once, just start by trying to get one in per day.  

And, rotate throughout your days too.

​This checklist is not meant to overwhelm you, but to empower you.
 
Or, if you are having a bad day and can’t figure out why life is giving you such a hard time; refer back to this checklist. 
​
  • Have you slept well?
 
  • Have you properly nourished your body? 
 
  • Are you hydrated?
 
  • Are you living in the present moment?
​Having the DAFFY self-care sustainability checklist keeps you accountable, takes the pressure off on the bad days, and gives you a chance to reflect inward so as to better love yourself.  And when we love ourselves, the world benefits, because by putting ourselves first we can then better serve the ones around us.” – Britt Olson
​To help you start practicing the to-do’s on this check-list, we’ve included tips for each individual favor you can do for yourself TODAY, RIGHT NOW, RIGHT HERE***:

WATER – I choose hydration to energize me

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DAFFY Tip:  Set reminders on your phone or calendars for check-ins throughout the day to ensure you are consuming enough water. 
 
Britt sets her reminders for 8am, 10am, 12pm, 2pm, and 5pm, rationing out her daily amount throughout the day. Anything consumed past 5pm is simply extra!

SLEEP – I will aim for a healthy sleep to properly recharge

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DAFFY Tip: Sleep per your natural rhythm. If you are a night owl and know you get jazzed come 10:30pm, do your part for yourself to ensure you are in bed by 9:00pm so you don’t get caught up in your second wind that keeps you up to 1am.
 
Chelsea needs 7 hours of sleep per day (or, grumpy gills is out to play the following day). For her, she mentally notes every afternoon what time she needs to be in bed by to gain 7 hours of sleep. Creating that pre-conversation with herself, helps Chelsea commit to her 7-hour rule.

EXERCISE - I can plan realistic movement into my schedule

​DAFFY Tip:  A 15-20min morning walk can and should be your new best friend. All we can say is: life changing.

FOOD - I will be intentional about when & how to nourish my body.

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 ​DAFFY Tip: Stop sabotaging your metabolism and pay attention to when your body does/does not want food.
 
If it’s 10am and your body is telling you it’s hungry, don’t make it wait until 12:30pm because you are determined to not eat anything between your smoothie at 8:30am and your lunch at 12:30pm.  If your body is signaling hunger – feed it. Just be smart about what you are feeding it with. 

VITAMIN D - I can slow down & enjoy the sunshine or take my Vitamin D supplement

​DAFFY Tip: Taking 5 minutes in the afternoon to step outside and feel the sun on your face will immediately lift your mood, curb your anxiety, and help you remember the good things in life.

CONNECTION - I will connect with my higher power & another human being

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​DAFFY Tip:  Don’t get lost digitally and lose your true sense of connection.  Connection to friends, family, empowering phone calls on your way home from work, and daily prayer are crucial to loving yourself.

BEING – I choose to be here now so that I am aware of my inner self & surroundings

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​DAFFY Tip:  Try being more mindful in your daily activities. When you are grocery shopping pay close attention to how the cart or basket feels in your hands, what do you smell, who else is shopping around you, how does the floor feel beneath your feet, how do the apples feel in your hands, what colors to do you see on the skin of apples?

GRATITUDE – I will reflect on something to be thankful for today

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​DAFFY Tip:  Immediately upon waking up in the morning think about 5 things you are grateful for and feel the gratitude fill your body, warm your heart and put a little smile on your face.
 
Your daily gratitude might include feeling grateful for your:  bed/mattress, comforter/blanket, the roof over your head, your windows, waking up, the new day ahead of you, your family, your friends, your body, etc.

Want Your Own Self-Care Sustainability Check-In Card?

YES PLEASE!

***Our DAFFY tips above are based on our own experiences. We are not experts or therapists. 
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January 2020 DAFFY Date Experience: How to Turn Fears into Favors in 2020

1/19/2020

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Fears.

Fears can nag us. 

Fears can try to win by crippling us down to our knees while our life blows up all around us.
Fears can be sneaky and drip into our lives for a long time before they suddenly try to destroy us.
Or, fears can be like a camouflaged monster and try to swallow us up swiftly before we even know it.

Sound familiar? 
Within the weight of fears, they can feel like limiting beliefs, the evil perfectionist that lives in our head, fear of not being enough, fear of rejection, and fear of other’s opinions. - Britt Olson
Ladies, you’ve been surviving and living through your fears for years.

You are fear warriors. 

But, maybe you still feel chained or controlled by them?

“In order to call our fears, we must first know what type of narratives these fears manifest into. Listed below are a few common fear narratives that may play in your head every day, every hour or every other season in life.” - Britt Olson
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These may come in various ranges and look like: ​

FEARS
​ The Most Common Fear Narratives:

  • I am not enough.
  • I’m going to be alone forever.
  • I am not worthy.
  • I won’t have the money/time to do XYZ.
  • I am being selfish.
  • I’m not strong.
  • I’m a fake. 
  • I need to be perfect.
  • No one wants to hear what I think.
  • I am responsible for others' happiness.
  • My dreams aren’t important.
  • I am afraid to give advice.
  • I won’t ever look like them. 
  • No one wants to hear my story.
  • I don’t want to upset him/her.
  • I will be deceived. 
  • I don’t want to rock the boat.
  • I am afraid of loss (Losing someone, freedom, season of life).
  • I’m afraid to fail.
  • I am not beautiful. I don’t look good.
  • I’m afraid of missing out (FOMO).
  • I’m too old. 
  • I'm a failure.
Fears don't define us.

These narratives do not get to win or control us. Because, we have the truth of ourselves and who we are to speak over them. Let’s take a look at the most common truths that we can speak over the fears we listed before.

TRUTHS
Truths we can speak over the most common fear narratives:

  • I am enough.
  • I’m wonderfully made.
  • I’m not being selfish. 
  • I am chosen.
  • Yes, the world wants to hear me.
  • I have a purpose in this world.
  • I am set apart.
  • I can’t control anyone but myself.
  • I matter.
  • I will be okay if I do fail. 
  • I am beautiful.
  • I will never stop growing.
  • I’m never alone.
  • Nothing is impossible.
  • Everything I need is within me.
  • Progress not perfection.
  • I’m only responsible for myself.
  • My story will help someone.
  • My story matters.
  • I am loved by my creator.
  • All deception will be brought to light.
  • I am loved/ I am not alone.
These are real. 

These win. 

Not the fears. 
When I finally realized that I had to face my darkest fears in order to gain my control back, is when I created a 3 step process called the “Triple L” Steps to turn my fears into favors for myself. It didn’t happen overnight. It took time, support and practice, but now it’s a process I do everyday to lean through my fears and
​ into truths. - Chelsea Harris



The “Triple L” Process​

  1. Liar, Liar: Call out your fear/fears.
    1. By literally saying your fears out loud or writing them down.
  2. Let it Go: Speak the truth/truth’s over your fear/fears.
    1. By either saying it out loud, writing it down on a piece of paper or speaking it to your Higher Power or human being.
  3. Lean Into the Truth: Do a favor for yourself & manifest these truths into reality.
    1. By either writing them out, talking them out with someone else, creating goals, making boundaries, etc…) - bring your truths to LIFE.​​

We owe it to ourselves to do the work to bring our truths to LIFE. Because they deserve life and we deserve life. Even if you are stuck right now and don’t believe your truths will live or the concept sounds so far out there; please know that it is possible. ​- Britt Olson
And, don’t worry, we’ve been there before too and in this beautifully messy process we will go back there again too, because that’s life and life isn’t meant to be perfect.

But, one thing we do know is.... we will continue trying and being the warriors against these fears every day with this process.

​Will you try it too?

You're a treasure,
Chelsea & Britt

Want your own self-care sustainability check-in card?

Yes, please!

Mark These DAFFY Dates in Your Calendar:

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DAFFY - Made By Real Women in Conversation

1/10/2020

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DAFFY stands for “Do A Favor For Yourself.” 

This powerful, actionable phrase manifested from real words by real women.
My name is Chelsea Harris, Co-Founder of DAFFY, and I officially started the DAFFY creation process in 2018. which involved research gathered from surveys, interviews and focus groups of anonymous women around the topic of self-care.

And in this journey of research, were conversations filled with vulnerability, emotions, values & expressions I couldn’t ignore.

When certain words were passed around in conversation, I was plugged into their rawness, dialed into their vowels & charged by their diction -  They were all familiar tunes humming inside me. 

Because, what these women were feeling, I felt and was feeling too.
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DAFFY is here because what women said to me which I’m sharing with you right here
[The responses are all anonymous]: 
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“When you wear a lot of hats you have to constantly make sure you aren’t dropping the ball. I work hard to keep up a strict workflow despite the struggles of raising a family and managing my own business.”

“As a female trying to balance work and life, I experience anxiety on a daily basis, and it has become a pretty consistent companion in the time I spend with my work. It comes as a direct result of the pressure to always be put together and maintain a flawless personal presence.”
“I work from home while also being a stay-at-home mom, so I get anxiety that I’ll have enough quiet time every day to get my hours in. On rough days, I stress over not getting much sleep because I have to work late and get up early to do so.”
​

“Coming together is so important and makes us feel so much better whether you’re struggling or thriving!"
Here’s what real women said via HuffPost regarding self-care below:
Self-care is... ‘not attending some extravagant spa day with the girls, but rather being able to identify when I need to slow down and perhaps cancel that spa day.’ - Katie McCartney

​“When self-care becomes a competitive and performative ritual on social media, it defeats its purpose... Self-care isn’t glamorous. It’s the everyday work you do for yourself to make you a little bit happier and healthy..If I had a self-care Instagram account, it probably wouldn’t be very popular ― there are only so many creative ways to take pictures of a water bottle or broccoli ― but self-care isn’t for other people, it’s just for you.” - Emily Bilek

Self-care is... ‘typically more difficult and less glamorous than treating yourself.’ - Emily Bilek

DAFFY is a way of managing our inner-wellness while we face life’s external unknown & uncontrollable circumstances.  

It’s a beautiful, sustainable way of living that grounds & grows us every day.
It might not look pretty, but it's progress not perfection.
Our hope is that DAFFY can ground & grow you too. 


Come sit with Britt & I + our team at the next DAFFY Date!
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    Chelsea & Britt

    Two friends making a commitment to DAFFY every single day and inspiring women along the way. 
    ​
    Life Hack: DO A FAVOR FOR YOURSELF, right now. 

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